By Rei Tanotsuka, 8 May 2021.
“Everyone has a right to be stupid. Some people abuse the privilege.” Joseph Stalin
I’ve always wondered to myself, how long does dumb luck last? As long as people are willing to brown nose the armed bully despite his single digit IQ!
Let me put a spin on Twain and say, while I won’t attend America’s funeral when it kicks the bucket, I’ll thoroughly approve of it! When will the lunacy of listening to the most hebetudinous nation on earth end?
We keep reiterating the slogan that it’s only an idiotic Trump and his legion of QAnon hanger-ons that is the problem (as if all the previous American presidents were the sharpest blades in the diamond cutting factory), but America’s crowning reign of asylum grade stupidity began upon the founding of the country. I mean you name the moral transgression, and I’ll give you the American president who not only barracked for it, but was positively willing to offer his first born to the shrine of that atrocity.
In today’s post, I will give a running list of “witticisms” from America’s best. No wonder we are all up shit creek sans a paddle listening to this lot! We need to question who has more brain damage, the idiots who uttered the following quotes, or us, the plebeians who call them equitable, just and continue to place them on our plastic pedestal…..
Let me say it AGAIN, these gems spurn forth from AMERICA’S TOP, this my dear reader, IS AMERICA!
George W Bush
On embracing technology and innovation…..
“A railroad! It would frighten horses, put the owners of public vehicles out of business, break up inns and taverns, and be a monopoly generally.” —ANDREW JOHNSON
“Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we.” GEORGE W BUSH
“You know what uranium is, right? It’s this thing called nuclear weapons. And other things. Like lots of things are done with uranium. Including some bad things.” —DONALD TRUMP
On having “normal” reactions to historical objects and facts…..
“If I were a single man, I might ask that mummy out. That’s a good-looking mummy.” BILL CLINTON swiping right at an Incan mummy during a visit at the National Geographic Museum.
“You know what happened to the Greeks? Homosexuality destroyed them. Sure, Aristotle was a homo. We all know that. So was Socrates. You know what happened to the Romans? The last six Roman emperors were fags.” —RICHARD NIXON
“Boy, they were big on crematoriums, weren’t they?” —GEORGE H. W. BUSH, during a tour of Auschwitz
“There is a physical difference between the white and black races which I believe will forever forbid the two races living together on terms of social and political equality. And inasmuch as they cannot so live, while they do remain together, there must be the position of superior and inferior, and I, as much as any other man, am in favor of having the superior position assigned to the white race.” —ABRAHAM LINCOLN
“If whites and blacks can’t get along together arrangements must be made to colonize the blacks.” —ANDREW JOHNSON
“I think one man is just as good as another so long as he’s honest and decent and not a nigger or a Chinaman. Uncle Will says that the Lord made a white man from dust, a nigger from mud, then He threw up what was left and it came down a Chinaman. He does hate Chinese and Japs. So do I. It is race prejudice, I guess. But I am strongly of the opinion Negroes ought to be in Africa, Yellow men in Asia and White men in Europe and America.” —HARRY TRUMAN
“New look or old look, all I can say is that Russia is the same old whore underneath, and the sooner we can drive her back into the back streets she came from, the better.” —DWIGHT D. EISENHOWER
“African-Americans watch the same news at night that ordinary Americans do.” —BILL CLINTON
“All men are equal before fish.” —HERBERT HOOVER
“Let me be absolutely clear. Israel is a strong friend of Israel’s.” —BARACK OBAMA
“I have made good judgments in the past. I have made good judgments in the future.” DAN QUAYLE
“My right eye is like a horse’s. I can see straight out with it, but not sideways. As a result, I cannot take a full swing because my nose gets in the way and cuts off my view of the ball.” —WOODROW WILSON, on his golf swing
“I am a man of limited talents from a small town; I don’t seem to grasp that I am President.” —WARREN G. HARDING
“You’d be surprised how much being a good actor pays off.” —RONALD REAGAN
“My choice early in life was either to be a piano-player in a whorehouse or a politician. And to tell the truth, there’s hardly any difference.” —HARRY TRUMAN
“Some reporters said I don’t have any vision. I don’t see that.” —GEORGE H. W. BUSH
And finally, on education…..
“Rarely is the question asked: Is our children learning?” GEORGE W BUSH
“We won with highly educated. We won with poorly educated. I love the poorly educated!” —DONALD TRUMP
Keep kissing frogs!
It’s not only teen girls with blue blood coursing through their veins who dream of turning reptiles into a humans….we do too!
It amazes me how much faith we place in a flagrantly destructive empire, staunch in our belief that under all the cold and callous actions, America is STILL the best nation to lead. Are we enamoured with its ability to breed citizens who have a conspiracy theory lined up for every day of the week, or for the fact that it “helps” the world through destabilizing every resource rich country, or buoyant market, by literally looting everything?
How do our consciences let us reconcile that despite Milton Friedman’s “economic” regime of torture and mayhem preceded: the dismantling of Developmentalism in the Southern Cone (Chile, Argentina, Uruguay, Brazil), the Tiananmen incident, the creation of 23 instant billionaires through sell-offs of Mexican assets in the Tequila Crisis, and Mbeki’s ANC South Africa collusion with its former whip masters to keep national resources in white hands, that somehow, American values are still lofty?
How do we tuck ourselves to bed every night and say “I know America is not perfect but it’s still preferable to China.”, are we FUCKIN’ high?
China was busy sending out oxygen tanks to India (WITHOUT getting any recognition or even a simple thanks), trying to survive all the sanctions the “magnanimous” West imposed on it, and building a Guiness record highway……..
………while America sat on its burgeoning “stimi” cheque butt, dialin’ up a global porn storm. I mean it only took SIX MONTHS OF PLEADING in the midst of a global pandemic, to get the head nod from the septuagenarian Biden for vaccine patents to be lifted, only to have the German chancellor bark no. Why do we INSIST that the West upholds pristine moral values, when they are the ones who prize money over the harrowing loss of lives? Why aren’t more people livid at the pickle faced Gates when he says something that is in gross violation of logic – how in the miseries of human hell, WON’T MASS MANUFACTURING VACCINES in as many countries as possible be effective in protecting people IF THE VACCINE THEORY IS TRUE?
I have always said this, and I remain loyal to it: you don’t have to be good but please, be REAL. If you’re an asshole, just say “I’m an asshole.” The worst thing you can do is don on some false lashes, lipstick your dimpled cheeks and ask for a kiss on the first date. As an asshole, it’s pretty hard to conceal what you’ve done because everything comes out in the end…..