America was built on bird turd

By Rei Tanotsuka, 4 March 2020

Yep, when I say America is full of shit, I’m not trying to be eloquent and attempting to hit a metaphorical high note, I mean America is literally built on shit.

When fertilisers made from bird turd proved to be a boon to agriculture in the 1800s, America wielded its military might predictably, to claim a group of Pacific Remote Islands as theirs. Yep, America not only likes black gold and metals, it digs turd too!

What shit isn’t America into?

The self proclaimed and sanctioned Guano Islands Act 1856, “gave” America the right to own these islands in the middle of the Pacific Ocean with the surrounding water areas, up to 200 miles, forming part of their “economic zone”. This zone was established to pilfer the abundance of bird shit emanating from the assholes of aves’ inhabiting the islands. Nothing weird here.

Why, that’s like me creating the “No limit cookie Act 2020”, which “authorises” me to shove inordinate amounts of biscuits into the hole in my face and proclaim it as HEALTHY AND LEGAL!

The bird poop guano, colloquially known as white gold, was used before synthetic chemical fertilisers were created, and they were prized for their mineral content, comprising of mainly nitrogen, phosphate and potassium.

Something for everyone to note here, if your butt pies were valuable, your terminal will be cleaned dry by the world’s biggest asswipe!

America, being as young as it is, is already proving its worth as the world’s most indiscriminate psychopath! Not only does it go around stalking bird shit, engaging in COUPS to overthrow democratically elected governments, poisoning it’s own children along the way with water laced with lead and PFAS, polyfluoroalkyl substances also known as “forever chemicals”, but it silences OTHER people’s children by evoking the Espionage Act of 1917, should an Australian journalist dare suggest its creepy ass, mass murdering idiosyncrasies as immoral, (while providing CONCRETE PROOF). All this truth for the price of 175 years imprisonment.

Then, it has the audacity to condemn China for “silencing it’s dissenters” (rolls eyes due to the hypocrisy) …. Oh, I wasn’t done.

But Assange isn’t a biological child, you quibble, surely, you ask in mock amazement, Ameritard will not silence its OWN CHILD, the children of the Empire, disciplined from childhood with civil liberties and FREEDOM OF SPEECH!

Enter Operation Vigilant Eagle..

While incarcerating and muting dissent is fun when exacting punishment on another’s child, there’s nothing quite like creating bad blood with the biologicals that brings true content to an unanimous psychopath.

Who is Australia, but America’s bogan stepsibling, someone who you have a piss fes with but surely, not the first person you turn to when you want to say, turn Lybia into a failed state! For that, you need a biological!

There’s a certain pride that comes with burdening that basket case child who you spawned and raised on a steady diet of trauma and abuse (in addition to its own innate stupidity), to give you the edge in creating unbridled chaos on a sovereign land patch that is NOT YOURS.

The heartless warmth, divinely paired with the malfunctioning cerebral cortexes of the American service men and women, are the biological weapons you need to maim, murder and psychologically scar innocent civilians in countries that don’t worship the same God as you do, and who don’t practice the same asinine political farce.

THEN, when these patriotic imbeciles return home feeling disillusioned, claiming not to know America is Lucifer nationalised before their sojourn into Faust’s Wonderland, because they… well… just used the internet for porn and cat videos, America then spies ON THEM, claiming that these repatriated homicidal maniacs are now “dangerous”.

Making matters worse, thanks to Operation Vigilant Eagle, a program launched by the Department of Homeland Security in 2009, military veterans returning from Iraq and Afghanistan are also being characterized as extremists and potential domestic terrorist threats because they may be “disgruntled, disillusioned or suffering from the psychological effects of war.” As a result, these servicemen and women—many of whom are decorated—are finding themselves under surveillance, threatened with incarceration or involuntary commitment, or arrested, all for daring to voice their concerns about the alarming state of our union and the erosion of our freedoms.”

Yes, Ameritard manages to jettison all the guilt a “normal” parent has for impinging unnecessary trauma on a child due to nothing but sheer avarice. Infact, it not only feels emotional ambivalence, it thinks making 67,000 veterans homeless in addition to subjecting them to surround sound surveillance is PERFECTLY COUTH! There’s no place like home eh Dorothy?

I’ve always said America is a grate nation, a nation where shit has currency and silence is the same as freedom of speech, should you point it out, your good conscience will be grated off your back till you plead blind allegiance to the Jekyll that the world will not dare to punish by whoop assin its hide.